Oh, sure, just like Indiana Jones, the cover story Paul is using for his visit to the Mediterranean aboard his mega-yacht Tatoosh is that he is there for an underwater "archaeological dig" but we here at the CIO Weblog know the real score; Paul Allen is the only man for the job when it comes to fighting off the underwater ninjas responsible for a series of Internet cable breaches afflicting the Middle East.

I promised you I would track this story and I am proud to say that I have stuck to the trail, cold and feeble though it has grown over the past year and a half, to reach this point: finally, secret and powerful agencies of the United States government have identified both the suspected ninjas, and the only billionaire technical genius in the world capable of dealing with them: Paul Allen.

Dispatched from his private lair on the shores of Mercer Island, Paul proceeded with the utmost haste aboard the Tatoosh, no doubt fully equipped with laser weapons and other exotic necessities he will require in his upcoming mortal underwater confrontation with the evil ninja syndicate reputed to be responsible for all the cable failures. Sure, he didn't take the Octopus with her two onboard submersibles, but I have it on good authority that this was because he "didn't want it to be too easy" when he meets the ninjas in battle. Besides, the Tatoosh has a nice theatre aboard to relax in with a young, attractive female sidekick (a la James Bond in Octopussy or For Your Eyes Only or... well, most Bond films, I suppose).

Go get 'em, Paul! We're with you all the way!